Stop right here! If you have no sense of humour or are a vindictive person who believes in taste, decency, and the right to suppress satire, please leave this site immediately!!!
If you’re still here, please read the following:
As stated above, this is satire. It’s made up. Still confused? This stuff is not true!
In case you wish to read further, please know that pieces, opinions, thoughts, and mad flights of fancy expressed here represent my own and not those of any employer, company, private jet, cat, partner, or any other organisation, individual, animal, plant, or rock connected to me. That means it is solely my opinion.
If you were wondering about journalistic intent, please understand I have no journalistic training whatsoever, and make no attempt whatsoever to pretend to be one. I wouldn’t go to jail to protect my sources either. That is, if I had sources.
Thoughts and opinions change from time to time, and I might think any of it is rubbish at some future date. I probably do already.
If you do wish to sue me, please don’t. I am not rich. The bit above about the private jet was just wishful thinking. I don’t even own my own house. It’s really not worth your while. I’m also spineless, so I’d probably remove anything you found offensive if you threatened me enough.
Comments:
Feel free to challenge, muse, or add your own witticisms to any entry, but I reserve the right to delete any comment for any reason whatsoever (especially comments mentioning Viagra unless the mention is satirical in nature).
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Rest assured that I do not share your e-mail address with anyone (especially not to men in black suits with sunglasses).
If you have read all of this, I’m very impressed. You must be an angry lawyer or have drunk too much coffee and stayed up too late. In either case, might I suggest some deep, yogic breathing?
