The Government and Catholic Church in Ireland have made a joint announcement today that they intend making the use of the words “accountability” and “accountable” illegal under the new Irish blasphemy law, and any journalists, bloggers, activists, victims, citizens or tourists who use those words, especially in relation to the government or the church will be liable to fines of up to €100,000 and even possible jail time.
“It’s a pesky word used by people trying to make us look bad,” said a source in the Vatican. “We wish we could implement the ban worldwide, but at least Ireland has always been wiling to do exactly what we want.”
Government sources say that healing could begin much quicker if people simply stopped thinking about the past and focused on the future and they say the new ban would help greatly in that process.
“Serious mistakes were made, with terrible consequences, but no one wants any more finger pointing or long, drawn out trials or tribunals. It only makes everything more awkward.”
Opposition leaders are said to be against the ban, at least until they take power, at which point they will probably support it.
Finally, although “accountant” and “accounting practises” were said to have also been considered for inclusion in the blasphemy bill, the financial lobby has managed to keep the words legal for the moment.
